dealing with pain in the past

I am sitting here, remembering my mom.  I do have to say that I miss her and part of me has been running from sitting still long enough to have any memories.  I remind myself that it is okay to cry but I am not so sure it is okay to run from ever thinking about it to escape my emotions.  I am sure every person on earth can think back to something in their past that would bring them painful memories, the thing is I just don't want to recreate in my life the things that were created in my past.  History does have a way of repeating itself.  But God never ceases to amaze me and tonight I just meditate on these scriptures:

Philippians 3:13-14 ESV

Brothers, I do not consider that I have made it my own. But one thing I do: forgetting what lies behind and straining forward to what lies ahead, I press on toward the goal for the prize of the upward call of God in Christ Jesus.

Isaiah 43:18-19 ESV

“Remember not the former things, nor consider the things of old. Behold, I am doing a new thing; now it springs forth, do you not perceive it? I will make a way in the wilderness and rivers in the desert.

2 Corinthians 5:17 ESV

Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation. The old has passed away; behold, the new has come.

You see my faith in strong, I have a belief that you cannot mess with about the creator of this universe.  I may not be able to articulate my belief as strongly as I feel it, but it is something that has been revealed to me through many series of events in my life.  I must admit, I had my own share of trust issues and I am still working through some but when I let go and put my whole and complete trust in God without any doubt, He ALWAYS shows himself faithful.

So nights like tonight, when I have a sadness in my heart for something painful that happened on this earth, God fills my heart with all that I could ever need and comforts me that I can use what was meant for evil to bring good into this world.

I am a strong believer that there is way more going on in this world then we (even the most intelligent of humans) can understand.  And so one of my all time favorite scriptures is

Proverbs 3:5-6

New International Version (NIV)

⁵ Trust in the Lord^(A) with all your heart
    and lean not on your own understanding;
⁶ in all your ways submit to him,
    and he will make your paths^(B) straight.^[a](C)

 I love how this verse is so simple yet so profound! You can apply SO many life situations to this one verse and your heart can be calmed.  Writing this blog and reminding me of these truths sure did calm my own heart and I know what God does for one person He will do for anyone. 

Life here with the Burdick's

Once again, it has been awhile since I last blogged.  I am so glad that I am taking the time to blog, since I know that many times my memory might fail to remember all the fond details of my everyday life with two little ones. The biggest change since my last blog is that Timmy is starting to explode in his talking.  And when I say explode, I mean before he was really just saying baby babble and now he is saying real words. I attempted to write down all of what he says now, but I know I am still leaving some words out, but here is what I can remember, Momma, Dadda, Ball (which I must say is his all time FAVORITE word, he says this one like 40 times a day), Choo-Choo, Bah (like a sheep), Woof, Red, Yellow, Grape, Juice, Water, Dora, Moo, Fish, and Dark (for when he helps me sort the laundry into lights and darks). His personality is SO different from his sisters that it is really interesting to watch this talking explosion since it is nothing like what I experienced with Abbie.  Abbie is loving her time playing prince and princess with her little brother, which usually is just her trying to boss around her little brother.  In all fairness, she really plays really well with him and they are so sweet together much of the time! I have started teaching violin/viola and piano again and Abbie does get pretty excited when a student leaves to want to try piano.  I haven't done much of anything but show her how to hold a violin and with that she did do amazingly well.  We are in the process of looking for a dance studio for her so I'm sure my next blog will be filled with details about that. For now, enough writing, here are some pictures of our fun!

Fun riding on daddy's mower

Abbie is getting excited to try new hair do's

Timmy loves his kisses

playtime at the mall

Mommy's little baker girl

Mommy's handsome little man

why can't I use two spoons??

Let's go down together

Swimming and trying out our floaties

Just watching a show together

Abbie got a turn too

Thankful for the holy spirit

I am wide awake, 3:43 in the morning and I can feel God working things together in the supernatural realm.  After taking some time to seek Him I feel the need to write a few things.  I have noticed this pattern in my life where I can feel a change coming in the spirit.  Life was given to us by God and He gave us a spirit to sense things so we don't have to live by our natural senses alone. Everyone's life is going to have high and low points, this is how we are created to grow and change.  If we just all lived flat lives it makes me think we would just be robots programed to just go through the motions, but praise God, we are not!! Everyone of us has different ways of handling all life brings us and there is no condemnation in Christ but we are all on this journey of growing that putting out that purpose that God has created us to do.  The unanswered questions in our life will one day be revealed but until then, God's rhema words to me each day are life and joy to my heart.  "Trust in the Lord will all your heart and lean not on your own understanding, in all your ways acknowledge Him and He will make your path straight" Proverbs 3:5 Such a simple and profound verse.  Praise God that I am continually growing in this.